By: causticblast
You sit on the couch, angled away from where she sits at the kitchen counter with her laptop. The camera is on for a Zoom meeting that's been going on for a rather long time, much longer than either of you anticipated. You're out of frame, but you can make out her Zoom window, where a powerpoint presentation is being screen-shared. She has a messaging window open next to it, from which she's been inconspicuously texting you from time to time.
She clicks to unmute. "Mmhmm...Yep. Yep, exactly. That's exactly what I was thinking..."
Idle words to show her engagement, but you both know better. Her attention was drained a long time ago. Still, she has to keep up appearances.
Click. "Yeah, we could try that. No, I agree..." Click.
Speaking of appearances, her choice of attire is quite an interesting one. She’s dressed semi-professionally...from the waist up. A clean, crisp button-down, classy blazer, and a carefully composed bun of hair radiates poise to anyone who is seeing her through her laptop webcam. But from where you're sitting, you can see clearly that she is wearing absolutely nothing below the waist. Without clothing to restrain them, her nude buttocks almost seem to spill over the edges of the inadequately sized chair with their soft, pillowy mass. It's a wonderful, if slightly comical, view. The juxtaposition between her highly professional demeanor and her shameless nudity is something that only you are currently privy to, and even though it's been well over an hour since her meeting began, you still find your eyes drawn to her. Though frankly, she's been giving you much more than a sight to see throughout this meeting.
BBBRRRRRGGGRRRBBRLLLLT
Taking full advantage of her mute feature, she’s also been farting freely for the past hour, with her coworkers none the wiser. Her backside occasionally erupts with an explosive fart that thunders against her seat and practically echoes along the walls. She never turns around or makes any gesture to acknowledge her farts, only occasionally sending you a message on your phone to tease you. She knows you love it, but can't do anything about it. As much as you would love to get closer to her gassy butt, you know you shouldn't pop into view of her camera.
FFRFRFRRRRPPPPRRRBBRBRRMMMMRRT
Click. "I think that's a great idea! Yeah. Let's go with that." Click.
Her control over her gaseous emissions continues to impress you. She leaves no more than a second of time between the end of her rumbling flatulence and clicking to unmute herself.
A message pops on on your phone. FUCK that one was good
You type back. Sure sounded like it
Babe I literally cannot rip these farts fast enough, there's too much gas building up inside me
You've literally been farting for the past hour
I’ve been holding back and pacing myself bc I don’t want to fuck up
You’re doing great so far
Thanks but I feel like I’m gonna have to go all-out soon
Click. "I'm...uh...I’m actually not sure." Click.
GOD they keep fuckin asking me for my input like they're actually gonna listen to it
PPPBRBBRRRRRRMMRFFFFRRT
She doesn't even shift her weight, maintaining composure for her colleagues. The stench does reach you, but it's clear that much of it has been trapped underneath her. That chair must be clinging on for dear life.
You raise an eyebrow at her previous message. Uhh what does “go all out” mean for you
She’s typing. You know I’m just leaking out a few farts here and there rn right? Like whenever the pressure gets too high? Like if I was sitting on your face I would not be going this easy on you lol
Click. “Exactly. Exactly.” Click.
She continues. I would instead be trying to cram as many farts down your throat as possible <3
You glance up at her alluring backside. So is that what you’re about to do to that poor chair?
Without looking away from her screen, she reaches down with one hand and gives her left cheek a sexy jiggle. She seems to be subtly adjusting her buttocks into place, planting herself even more firmly on the surface of the seat. Oh you know it...Get ready for blast off hehe
PPPRRRRROOUUUFFFFFRRRRRRRLLLT
Another massive ripper bellows out from underneath her, punishing the innocent chair with a huge dose of flatulence.
Click. “Mmhmm. Yeah. Yeah, I think she suggested that in last month’s meeting, actually.” Click.
BBRRRRRRRRRRRRRRPPPRRRRRROOOAAAARRBBBRRRBBRRRRPPPTT
“Mmmm...” A closed-mouth moan escapes her as she tries desperately to continue maintaining composure. The sheer relief and pleasure of unloading a behemoth fart like that was evidently too much for her to keep silent.
You see her click to her other window again. This is honestly so fun, it just feels so naughty lol
Yeah?
I almost don’t want this meeting to end
PPFPFFFFRRRRRRRLLT
She continues typing. That reminds me are we still going for groceries after this?
Yep I’m ready
Sweet, we'll go as soon as this is over
PPPPPBRRRRLLLRRRRRRAAAAUUURRRRRMMMT
BRRRRRRRRRBBBBBFRRFFFFRRRRRLLT
As she promised, her gas seems to kick up a notch. She’s not just relieving excess pressure anymore; she’s actively pushing them out. Your envy of the chair grows stronger.
PPPPRRRRRRRAAAAUURRRRMMT
FFFFFFRRRRPPPBBBBRRRRRFFFRRRRRT
In between unmutings, she continues her gassy barrage. Her eggy stench has started to permeate the space, and she shows no signs of slowing down. If anything, she’s getting bolder now. If her previous goal was to simply make it to the end of her meeting without them knowing of her gassiness, then now it seemed her new goal was to completely empty her gas tank before the end of the meeting.
God there is SO MUCH GAS swirling in my gut rn I can feel it
PPBRBRBRRFFFFFRFRRRGGRLLLRRGGRRRT
PPPBRRBRRRRRRUUAARRRRRPPP
PPLRRRRRBBBRRRGGGRRRRRRPPRRRAAARRRT
Click. “Oh, sorry, I didn’t hear you, I think my audio cut out for a sec. Could you repeat that?...Yes, I agree, there’s a better way to do it but the resources just aren’t there yet.” Click.
HAHAH my farts are so loud they just drowned out their questions LMAO
You look up at her to confirm that she is, in fact, wearing earbuds. Don’t get too carried away...
She shifts a little in her seat. Relax I got this lol
PPPRRRRRMRMMMRRRRT
pppbbpbbpbBBBBPPBBRPPRRRR—ppt...
Click. “Well we can discuss that next week, since he’s not on the call right now. Click.
—PPBBRRRRRRRRAAAAUUUUURRRR—RRT...
Click. “Yes, he’ll be available tomorrow as well.” Click.
—BBBRRRRRRRRFFfrrrr-pprrt...
Click. "No, not that I'm aware." Click.
—ggGGGRRRRRMMMMBBRBRBRRRPPRPRRRT
As if to prove her point, she casually pulls off a truly impressive feat of flatulence control. She switches between farting and speaking, cutting off her sustained gas release whenever she wanted to unmute and speak. With less than a second of a margin in between, she barely shows any strain. If anything, she’s savoring the glee of doing something so dirty in full view of her coworkers. There's something irresistible about the whole thing. Her Zoom colleagues would never imagine someone as composed as her to be so shamelessly gassy, deriving such erotic pleasure from every fart that blew out of her rear. And they'd certainly never expect that she was actively farting between her own sentences so deftly, getting high off her own fumes at work.
See? I'm in full control
You roll your eyes at her, though you’re not sure she can see it. You’re just showing off now
She continues her bombardment for another few minutes. She shifts a little in her seat as the constant buildup of steam underneath her begins to affect the comfort of her bottomless sitting position. As she wiggles her hefty buttocks from side to side, she types another message.
You think I can get away with dropping a huge SBD while talking?
Almost none of her farts have been remotely silent thus far, so you're not sure what she's thinking. Perhaps her naughty mind is getting ahead of itself. You watch as she continues adjusting her seat before settling down and farting again.
pppPBBRRRFFffrrrrrrr...rrrrrRRBBRRRRrrrr...pppRRRBBBRRRPBBBPPPRRRT
As she loosens her valve, she leans a bit forward, pushing her buttocks back along the chair to give herself a more open exit to release the gas. You can tell by the sound that she's modulating the pressure, trying to control how powerful the hot air blows out of her and bring it down to a whisper. Her first attempt fails, and a bassy drone is the quietest she can get before she gives up and lets go in a thunderous blast. A short while later, she tries again.
PPRPRRBRrrrrffrrrsssss...sssssssSSSSSsssshhhh...
Click. "Yes, I wondered that as well. And frankly, I- I...nng...I haven't wrapped my head around that quite yet, but I think we should stick with what- w-what works." Click.
ssssSSSSSSSSRRRRT
And she nails it on the second try. A light rumbling sound signals the beginning of another fart, but she reaches behind her and casually pulls her thick cheeks into a better position. The sound morphs into a hiss that grows quieter as she eases up. Seizing the opportunity, she unmutes to make her comment, talking over that subtle sound. She almost gives it away when she has to adjust the pressure of her silenced gas cannon mid-sentence, but she manages to keep herself steady. Once she's muted again, she blows out the rest of the pent-up pressure.
HAHAHAHAH FUCK YES She messages you while trying desperately to maintain a neutral poker face for the camera. OMG THAT WAS SO LONG TOO also holy fuck it stinks lol
Thankfully, she doesn't have to hold her expression for long.
Click. “Alright, thank you!” Click. Click.
She slumps in her chair, head hanging over its back. A wicked smile emerges on her face. “Ughh, fucking finally.”
“Is the meeting over?” You ask.
Instead of responding with words, she turns her head to lock eyes with you. Then, you begin to hear the unmistakable roar of her ass.
PPPRRBRRRRRRRBBBBBBBRRRRMMMMRRRRRRFFFRRRMMMM...
“Uhh...” is all you can manage.
...MRRRRRFFFFFFFRRAAURRRRROOOOOOORRRRRRRRGGGGGRRLLLRRGGRRRRRPPPPT
Wow.
She heaves a sigh of immense relief. “Yes, it’s over...And I think that was the last of my pent-up gas, too.”
It takes you a second to regain your composure after that gigaton blast she just unleashed into her chair, so you sit there staring at her devious smile for a bit. It sounded like it felt incredible leaving her, and you can tell from her expression that it was indeed a divine sensation. The eggy stench hangs thick in the air, somehow having completely pervaded the space, which includes the kitchen and living area.
“Alright. Now let me go put on some pants and we can head on out.”
You try to calm yourself, trying to swallow down the horniness swelling inside you before you can head out in public. You look around, going down a mental checklist of things you need to take with you. Keys, wallet, phone is in hand...
Mask. You realize you can’t find your mask.
“Oh, you looking for this?”
You look up at her. She slowly rises from her seat, then bends over the counter. As her nude, round cheeks spread open, you can make out a small piece of fabric scrunched up in the crevasse between.
She can’t stop giggling now. “Soaked in almost two hours of my farts, damn babe, you are in for a treat!”
PPPRRRRRRAAAABBBPPT
With one last short but powerful fart, she manages to dislodge your mask from between her cheeks, and you both watch it flutter down to the floor.
“They still require masks in the store,” she reminds you. “Good luck!”