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Farce of Felix
PART 2 She sat on the couch, hands in her lap, biting her lip anxiously as she tried not to make eye-contact with her creator. She felt another grumble in her abdomen and she slowly tilted over, allowing free passage for her inhuman smelling gas.
PART 3 It was black as night. Felix was knocked out cold from the onslaught of farts he was subjected to, and was now unconscious. But at the same time, he felt aware. Almost as if he was asleep and awake at the same time. Sleep paralysis, he thought? No, couldn't be. This felt different. And frightningly so. He tried moving his limbs but it was as if someone severed them completely from his torso. He didn't even have the energy to open his mouth to breath. He took a long breath through his nose, and he suddenly heard a voice. "So that smelly bitch actually managed to escape, huh? And didn't even tell ME? I mean, what if I wanted to go with? She's as selfish as she is gassy..." Felix's thoughts were everywhere. Was this a dream? Who's voice was that? And smelly bitch? Who could she be talking about? "If that idiot actually managed to find a way out and escape this loser's head, then surely I can too. And boy, when I get my hands on her, the only place she'll be trying to escape is my guts.." What the hell was this woman on about? Felix had given up trying to make sense of it, instead he started focusing on waking up from.. whatever state he was in. "Look out, stinky. You can run, but you can't hide. I'm coming for you." Felix awoke with a loud gasp, as if he had just been resusitated. He started coughing and felt like he was about to hack up a lung, and to his surprise, the smell of ass still faintly lingered. He steadied his breathing and just stared blankly at the ground, trying to clear his mind. "Ugh.." he groaned. "My fucking head aches.. aghh.." He exhaled very deeply before rubbing his face and sitting upright. He looked around before he quickly remembered he was not alone. "Oh shit, the girl!" He got up as fast as his aching body would let him and he started calling out to her. "Hey! You still here? Where are you?" "Felix!" He heard her voice. No telling what she was up to. "I'm in the kitchen! C'mere quick! Hurry! Vaminos, Vaminos! Arriba Arriba! Go, go, go! Faster, faster, faster!" Felix rubbed his temples as his ears were assaulted with her constant yelling telling him to hurry. "Okaaaaay! I'm coming just.. please, quiet down.." he mumbled. He arrived in the kitchen and saw Her standing there with her hair up in a pony-tail and she was mixing a pot of unknown contents. They both stared at each other for an unusual amount of time, observing each other in silence. Felix had a stagnant expression on his face, while she had a silly smile and tried her best to hold back her laughter as she absent-mindely kept mixing whatever the hell was in that pot. Felix took the initiative to break the silence. "So uhh... what cha got there?" "I'm glad you ASKED!" She responded, unnecessarily loud, causing Felix to rub his head again. "I took all the cans of beans I could find. Baked, pinto, black, you name it. Then I looked in the fridge and found some left over enchilads, along with some shredded cheese. I got a jug of milk, some hot sauce, the rest of your ice cream, and theeeen I made some eggs. After I made the eggs, I took 'em and mixed 'em up with some cabbage. I still needed a little something more though.. so I got the bottles of mountain dew you had. After I was satisfied with my ingridients, I took it all and dumped it into this pot and heated it up on the stove. And now.." She trailed off, lifting the spoon up from the pot and licking it. "I'm going to eat it." She said, giving him a grin even the cheshire cat would be jealous of. Felix's eyes shot open. "Like fuck you are! You used nearly half of my food to make some sort of concoction that you and I BOTH know will literally tear your stomach up. Not happening." "Oh?" She raised her eyebrow. "And are you going to stop me?" She gave a cocky chuckle. "Yes," Felix answered. "I am." He got in a position, ready to pounce. She shot him a seductive smile. "Then come and get me, big bo~ OOF!" Before She could even finish her statement, Felix wasted no time and charged her, knocking her onto the floor and sending the pot flying high in the air. Felix got on top of her and straddled her, pinning her arms down by her wrists. He smirked at her as she tried to free herself from his grip. "You're not going anywhere, stinky." She opened her mouth, no doubt to say some snooty remark, but the loud *CLANG* of the pot hitting the floor was made. And miraculously, all the gassy ingredients was still bubbling away inside of it, unscathed. They both looked at it, and She managed to react just a tad quicker than poor Felix. She caught him at the right time and bucked him off, and started crawling towards the pot like mad. "Haha, Felix! You snooze, you lose! That pot is miiiiiAAYYYYYEEEEE!!!" She screamed as she felt Felix's hand grab her ankle and start pulling her back towards him. "I'm not letting you eat that shit!" He grunted. He pulled her back close enough to him, and proceeded to crawl over her to retrieve the pot. But he forgot, crawling over her would put his face right near her.. weapon. As she felt him start to crawl over her, She timed it just right and waited for his face to get right where she wanted it. After it happened, she grunted. PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPLLLLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTTTTT!!!! A short, 4 second fart that was undeniably wet exploded from her ass. What in lacked in length, in made up for in stench, giving the kitchen the funk of sulfur and roadkill. Felix gagged and reeled back, the blast was a direct hit in his face, blinding him by it's heat alone. "Ooooh, Me one, Felix zero!" She gloated, giving her bodacious booty a satisfying "SMACK!" "And now, for you.." She referred to the pot. She began her crawling before Felix quickly recovered and grabbed her ankle once more, this time making haste. He climbed on top of her from behind and relaxed all his weight, rendering her immobile. "Hey! Ugh! Get.. Get offa.. mee!" She struggled. Felix laughed. "Now you see how it feels." She didn't bother to dignify his statement with a response, instead, she reached her arms out just enough and successfully grabbed the pot! "Aha!" She shouted. And quick as lightning, she took the spoon and started shoveling the icky looking concoction into her awaiting mouth. "Nom! Nom! Nom!" She grunted after every spoonful she crammed in her throat. "Hey! No! Stop eating that!" Felix shouted. He took his right hand and slapped the pot, sending it flying across the floor, where it tipped over, spilling all of it's contents. It burbled and glorped on the floor, looking like it should be in a chemistry lab instead of a kitchen. Felix gasped as he rolled off of her. "Haaa... Haaaa... I.. I win.." He sighed. "I.. need a breather.." Felix closed his eyes and continued to pant like a dog. But She on the other hand looked at her spilled creation with a sour look. "Dammit.. and I almost had it too.." "Almost is the key word there, uhm... Uhhh.." Felix trailed off. "What?" "Do you uh.. Do you even have a name..?" "Of course I do! It's.. It's um.. erm..." "You don't have a name, do you?" "Nope!" She said with a smile. "Yeah. Thought so. Well.. I could give you one. Shouldn't be too hard, right?" She nodded her head rapidly, obviously excited. Felix pondered. "Hmmm.. how about.. Fifi?" "Fifi?" She repeated. She stared at Felix, giving him a reluctant expression. "Oh.. well if you don't like it, then we could come up with ano-" "I LOVE IT!" She shouted, interrupting him. "FIFI! MY NAME IS FIFI! I CAN'T BELIEVE I ACTUALLY HAVE A NAME! FIFI! I'M FIFI! THAT'S ME! FIFI!" Fifi then lost herself in a vicious bout of laughter as Felix couldn't help but smile. He looked up at the ceiling and his thoughts ran rampant again. What was he gonna do with her? He hasn't forgotten, this girl, that was laughing up a storm next to him, used to be in his head, being nothing more than an erotic preference. An erotic preference that somehow grew so strong that it manifested itself into a physical being. And not only that, it was also strong enough to leave his cognitive prison and make itself known in the real world. Was there a way to get her to go back? And would she WANT to go back? He didn't know the answers. As he thought more and more, a very sharp pain impacted his head, causing him to grab it in agonizing pain. "Graaahhhh!!" He shouted. "My.. M-My head! It hurts! Argh, i've never.. felt anything like this before in my life!" He gritted his teeth and screamed, his body getting weaker and his sight getting darker. "Ohmigosh! Felix! Are you okay!? Stay with me!" Fifi put her hand on Felix as a way to comfort him, but was virtually doing nothing. "I.. I don't know! My head feels like it's gonna burst...!" And with that, the pain became too much to bear and he slowly faded away to the sound of Fifi's voice. "Don't worry, Felix! I'll take care of you! You'll be fine! And I totally won't try and make another one of my Fart Soups!" Felix blacked out again. Could this day get any crazier?
PART 4 Blacked out. Again. This is what, the second time I've done this? At least I didn't pass out to farts again. But I couldn't imagine anything worse than.. than that insufferable pain! It was like someone desperately trying to claw their way out of my sub-conscious! Like someone who desperately wanted to be freed and took the initiative to break their way out of my noggin' by pure, brute force. As if someone wanted to escape th- ... Oh no. ------------------------------------------------------------------- "N-No, stop! D-Don't eat me! Put me.. Put me down! Stop! Feeliiiiiix!!!" Felix heard his name as a voice cried out for help. It wasn't hard to tell that someone was definitely in trouble, but who? Could it be.. Fifi? It had to of been. But what was the problem? He tried to wake up for the second time, he swore it grew more difficult each time he fainted. "Can't you see? Digging my way out of that numbskull's head knocked him clean out. I'll be truly surprised if he wakes up, and maybe I won't think he's such a sissy afterall." Sissy? He thought. Who is she to call him a sissy?! Oh, he'd show her.. just.. as soon as he'd wake up. "Felix isn't a sissy! Urgh!" He continued to hear the faint struggles of Fifi. "And when he wakes up, he's gonna save me and kick your aaaaAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!" "Oh, am I squeezing too hard? Too bad. I don't care. You sure didn't care about me when you left me in there without saying anything! You didn't even think of taking me with you! Gonna be honest, stinky, you hurt my feelings. I could've died in there." "Guh, died?! W-What do you mean.. urgh.. died!?" "Died," the mysterious voice repeated. "Of boredom!" "Ugh, what the hell are you talking abo-" Fifi was interrupted before she could say anymore. "Face it! Felix only pays attention to me when he gets tired of you! So he'll spend a couple hours with me and make me feel all special and after he's done, he throws me to the side and starts dry-humping you again! It's ridiculous! And to top it all off, you get up and leave to spend even MORE quality time with him! Oh yeah, this is happening. Hope you have fun in my stomach, loser!" "Wait, wait, wait! Noo! Stop! You don't understand! That isn't the reason I left, I can explain! Just please, don't eat me! I'm not food!" Felix was now giving it his all to wake up from his pain-induced coma. It frustrated him to no end to sit here and be helpless in total darkness, only knowing he was alive by the constant bickering of Fifi and the other unidentified voice. "Hmm?" the voice said, intrigued. "Alright. You better give me a good explanation. If I don't like it, you'll be receiving a first class ticket to my insides. And trust me, the ride will not be a fun one. Speak, and make it snappy." Fifi sighed. "I left because the other night, I heard Felix talking about me. About how he disliked me, and wish he had another fetish. I cried and I felt so bad.. I didn't know what else to do. He didn't say he hated you or anyone else, just me. So I figured he'd be better off if I left.. so I did." There was a long silence before Felix heard the other voice. "Oh.. i'm.. i'm sorry. I didn't know. I thought you skedaddled so you can come out here and have Felix to yourself but it turns out.. he's a douche. Must've been hard on you, stinky. Hey, I have an idea. Let's load you up on the nastiest shit we can find and you can fart up his nose until his nostrils feel like they're on fire. And when he's begging for mercy, I'll come up behind him and gobble him up. Sound good? Sigh, but knowing him, he'll probably like it. Ah well, he'll learn soon enough that being inside a tummy isn't so sexy after all.." Felix could literally hear the devilish smile in her voice. Fifi spoke again. "Well.. you see.. Felix and I talked. And.. we worked things out. I even gave him a forgiveness present!" "Which was..?" "Facefarts!" Fifi said excitedly. "Of course it was, stinky." He heard the voice laugh. "He even gave me a name! Oh! I forgot to tell you! My name is Fifi! Can you believe it? Fifi is my actual name!" "Fifi, huh? Hmm... It does have a ring to it. Hehe, I like it. Still gonna call ya Stinky, though." "Meh, whatever. As long as Felix calls me Fifi!" Fifi laughed, before taking a deep long gasp of realization. "Heeeeyyyy!!! I talked to Felix! Maybe you can talk to him to! You guys can work it out! Yes, I can see it now!" The voice took a bit to respond. "You.. You really think so? I mean, i've never talked to him before.. i've only judged him on his thoughts and actions.." She trailed off. "And he comes off like a major wimp." "Trust me!" Fifi reassured. "It'll work." "..Alright. I trust you. But.. he's out cold. What do we do until he wakes up?" "Until he wakes up? No, no. We're gonna wake him up. Here, put me down and follow my lead." "Okay, fine." "Yay!" Fifi shouted. She made her way over to Felix's body, which she had relocated to the living room. She got on all fours beside him, shoving her beautiful, panty-clad ass in the air, moving it side to side in a slow, rhythmic manner. "Okay. What I want you to do is take him and shove his cute little nose right into my booty. Make sure to get him in there nice and deep, hehe.." The other voice sighed, and transitioned into a series of giggles. "Why am I not surprised that your plan would involve your ass? Alright, give me a second." Felix felt his limp body get lifted, and his head was then shoved into the backside of Fifi. It felt unreal how far his head was wedged in between her massive cheeks, and he felt his nose meet her asshole, only seperated by a thin layer of sweat drenched cotton. The voice spoke again. "Alright.. he's.. he's as deep as I can get.. erm, get him." The person behind the voice made sure Felix's face was well secured in the smelly canyon that was Fifi's butt by constantly shoving on his head. She then stopped, but kept a firm right hand on the back of his head, to make sure he got every bit of whatever Fifi was about to unleash. "Okay. Ready when you are, stinky." "Good," Fifi mumbled, as her stomach gave off a series of sickening churns and gurgles. "Cause I gotta fart... Hrrgg.." PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLTTTTTTTTT!!!!!! A massive, 40 second long meaty trumper of a fart barreled it's way straight out of Fifi's guts right into Felix's nostrils, where they unleashed a gaseous hell on his sense of smell. It instantly filled the room with a heavy smell of spoiled milk, rotten cabbage, and that unforgettable aroma of moldy, rotten eggs. It was a satanic stench that had Felix's nose in a chokehold. Not only that, but the fart was so hot and forceful, it almost blew Felix right out of her cheeks. The mysterious person holding Felix in place had to hold it even harder, making sure he was still sucking up butt fumes. The voice started coughing before she spoke once more, "Cough cough.. holy shit.. that is seriously ripe.. what the hell did you eat!?" "If I told you, you wouldn't believe me.. oooohhh... Oh god.. get ready, my belly is baking up another round of poots.." Fifi was right. Her stomach was growling something fierce, working unreasonably hard to digest and churn up that dangerous mixture she willingly ate. She was starting to regret making and eating a second bowl of Fart Soup. She moaned some more before resting her head on the ground and clutching her midsection with both of her arms, getting into a true "Face Down, Ass Up" position. Her stomach gave off another grumble, this one a whole lot louder than the other ones. They prepared themselves as she inhaled and grunted. BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!! POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!! FPPPPTTT.. FPPT.. PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!! BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUPPPPPPPPLLLLLLLLLTTT!!! An onslaught of gas exploded from Fifi's rear and and introduced the room to a haze of dark green fog. It only intensified the inescapable smell. This time, adding a slight hint of rotten chopped onions, along with a sulfuric stench. It was beginning to make the room humid. "Ahhhhh.. Oh fuck, that felt awesome.. mmmm.." Fifi was in her own little world of relief as she shook her ass slowly back and forth, letting out a small(for her) fart with each movement. Pppppprrrttt! Pppppfffftttt! Bbbbpppppfttttt... BrrrrrrrTTTTT! Felix's head was still at the epicenter of it all, absorbing the farts like the perfect receptacle. "Ugh!" The voice groaned. "God, can he wake up already!? Your ass has to be violating some chemical weapons contract right now! God damn, this shit reeks!" Fifi laughed, relief still in her voice. "I'm sorry.. but you have no IDEA how nice that was to get out of my system.." "Yeah, I bet. I don't know how much more of this I can take, stinky. It's getting to be too mu-" And at that moment, Felix started coughing. Hard. Fifi's eyes perked open. "Is.. is that him!? Is he waking up!?" "I think so! Your farts did the trick!" Felix started gasping as he took both of his hands and grabbed both of Fifi's meaty cheeks, and took a long, deep sniff. Both of them were in shock. "Is he.." Fifi started. "Breathing your ASS!?" Fifi laughed. "Ha! See? Told ya he doesn't hate me." Felix snapped back to reality and pushed himself away from Fifi's hellish butt, and ended up launching himself and the mysterious person back a couple feet. His eyes opened up, and he realized he landed in someone's lap. He looked up and saw the one who the voice belonged to. "Hey, weirdass. Nice to see you up.." She said to him. Felix blinked before responding. "And.. And you are..?" "Your vore fetish. In the flesh." |
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