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My Pet Research Assistant
Author: Closet Fetishist

Written: December 18th, 2009

“Are you sure? Aren’t you like forty minutes away?” Marla asks.

“Yeah, but, it’s cool; I wanna help you out. Plus, it’ll be nice to finally meet in person.”

“You’re so sweet! Sure, alright, I’ll be at the Public Library on Main; meet you at two?”

“Sounds great; I’ll see you then Marla. Have a great night! Bye-bye!”

“Okay. And you too! Bye!” She says, warmly.

She seems as excited as I am, and, to be honest, I am pretty fucking excited; I help her out here and there may be some action in it for me later in the day. Bye-bye virginity.


I met Marla several months ago on an online dating site. She was extremely warm and forward for a while but, as she became familiar with how far away I lived from her, she decided to pull back and no longer sought to pursue a relationship. I was forced to accept this as reality and become an ‘online friend.’ Ever since then I’ve been trying to go on at least one fucking date with her in hopes of being her ‘go-to-guy’ for ‘friends with benefits.’ I know, I sound like a total asshole but when you’ve been alone for twenty-three years, you start to get a little deviant in thought and heavily desperate. I’ve sent her special, heartfelt, and, frankly, expensive gifts all out of my true kindness but also in hopes of securing some kind of invite for a sexual ‘repayment.’ I’ve never heard anything but a sincere thank you; good enough for most kind men, I guess. Not for me.

Physically, Marla is ‘decent’ at least. Large breasted and hipped in accordance with her not petite body; perhaps the best word to describe her would body-type would be ‘husky.’


We meet outside the library.

“Hi Ron!” She exclaims loudly.

We hug.

“Hey Marla! How are you doing?”

“Fine, just fine; how are you?”

“Excellent, excellent; quite excited to be here.”

“I’m glad; it’s like a graveyard in there, I’m there all alone so I’m happy I finally have some company.”

“Great, I’ll be happy to be that company.”

“Good,” she says with a kind smile. She’s so beautiful. “Follow me, I’ll show you were I’m all set up.”

I follow her into the library; following at enough distance to allow myself enough opportunity take in her ample buttocks resting comfortably against her longish-flowing skirt. I quickly and repeatedly dart my eyes from her ass to her head until we finally reach her workstation; a large wooden table with books all about. All of them have the word ‘Autism’ somewhere in the title.

“What do you have there?” Marla asks, indicating to under my arm.

“Oh, this? I wanted to ensure you had all the information you could possibly want so I went surfing the net last night for everything I could find; highlighted the best information.”

“Oh my God! When does the sweetness end?”

I smile, “Presumably never.”

She smiles, “You’re such a nice guy Ron; I’m surprised no one’s still snapped you up.”

She pauses.

Then she grabs my wrists; “I guess I’ll have to.”

I looked at my wrists and then at her. She smiles so sweetly.

I smile in response.

A few awkward seconds go by.

I gently pull my arms away but she continues to hold them at the wrists.

I pull harder but she doesn’t let go.

“What are you doing?” I ask.

“You sir, are gonna help me.”

“I know, I am; that’s why I’m here,” I reply with a hint of fear in my voice; almost as if I was asking her if that is why I was here.

She releases one wrist; I pull it away from her quickly. It’s incredibly sore; she had held on to it so tightly.

She turns around and lifts her skirt to her back; her naked ass is exposed to me.

“You see that?”

“Why aren’t you wearing underwear?” I ask, obliviously.

“I don’t want to ruin them, duh!”


Before I can say anything else, she grabs my other wrist again and pulls me towards her chair. She grabs a pair of handcuffs from her purse nearby and cuffs my wrist to the chair. She does the same on the other. Now I am here, sitting on the floor with the back of my head resting on the sitting part of her chair.

“There now, that’s perfect. I had my doubts over whether this would work or not but you apparently fit quite well there. I’m glad.”

“What are you going to do?”

“Sweet but a complete idiot. Luckily, that’s how I like my guys,” she stated with a smile.

The excitement over being called ‘her guy’ leaves quickly.

“But...since this is a library, we must keep our voices down.”

She put a piece of duct tape over my mouth.

My eyes go wide when she proceeds to lift her skirt and drop her naked ass on my face. She is so heavy; my face feels as if the skin will peel away and only bone will remain.

She finally rises a few inches.

My eyes take time to adjust but it looks as if her hands are on each of her butt cheeks.

“Okay Ron, tell me what you think of this line...”

I think about how I’m going to respond with tape over my mouth when it hits.


A disgusting fart bellows out of her asshole and brushes across my face with the force of a decent summer wind gust; hot and powerful. Then the smell; oh God it is rank; the smell of rotting vegetables so potent that I swear my eyebrows would be gone.

“Oh fuck yes! Shit! I’d been holding that one in since you got here. Damn Mexican food does it to me every time but I just love those beans and rice.”


Oh fuck! Another one. I try to shimmy myself out of my restraints but it fails as the smaller gust blows against my features.

Then, a new horror, as she proceeds to sit again, forcing my nose right up against her stinky asshole. It is humid, in addition to putrid. I hold my breath but it is in vain, I am forced to breathe eventually and when I do I get a big whiff of Marla’s last bowel movement.

Hours seem to pass before she rises again.

“Okay, I really do need your help this time. Tell me if this sounds good, ‘Autism, in addition to...BRRRRPPPPPP..ahhhh, um, in addition to motor disabilities, is also known to cause...oh God...PPMMMMMMMMFFFTTTT...yes...ahem...known to cause learning disorders and even disorders with sight and hearing.”

The smell is severely fucking with my brain; I’m not even sure what she said.

She slapped me in the face, hard.

“Is it good?” She asked, impatiently.

I didn’t know what to say.

“Here, let me give you a minute to...ugh...BRAAAMPP... mull it over,” she said as she sat back down on my face, the fart still streaming out of her ass.

She grinds, forcing the fart into my nose and spreading it like butter all over my features. I can imagine I’ll never smell correctly again, in both senses of the word.
She finally rises off me, “So, fart it good?”

I nod, I just nod...I don’t even know what I am nodding to but I nod in agreement.

“It is? And you think I’m a great writer?! Awww, you’re so sweet, I love you so much...I got a surprise for you.”

I shudder to think what it could be.

“You’ve been such a good boy, I’m gonna give you a break. I’m almost done, meet me in the girls’re really gonna like this, I swear.”

She sounds so genuine, maybe this is just something she did to guys are first...a test of loyalty and dedication perhaps.

“Are you excited?”

I nod, sincerely.


She cuts me free, removes my tape, and allows me to rise from her throne.

I am about to speak, ask her what was up with that, when she stops me.

“It’s right down there, quickly now.”

I smile and race over there.

I enter the girls bathroom; it’s public but there is a lock on the door. Three stalls, one of the stall doors is closed. I peer underneath and I think I see shoes but I am quickly startled as a figure jumps out.

A few terrifying seconds pass before I see that it is Sammie; Marla’s best friend. She’s skinner than Marla, more my type in body, but she is not as attractive facially.

She grins like an idiot, a fake smile that apparently has carried over from her pictures.

“So, you’re Ron, huh?”

“Uh, yeah.”

“You’re cute.”

“Thank you.”

She steps forward and takes a sniff of me.

“Yep, smells like she got you pretty good.”

“Oh, that? Nah, that was nothing.”

“Really? Nothing?”

“Yeah, it’s totally...whatever, I’m fine.”

“Hm...interesting,” she said, in feigned disbelief.

“So, are you part of the surprise?”

“Yep, I most certainly am.”

“So...what should we do?”

“Eager man, aren’t ya?”

I just smile.

“Well okay,” she says with a smile.

She floats over to the wall and gestures me.

“Come here.”

I do so.

“Now kiss me.”

I give her a small peck on the lips.

“What the fuck was that?”

“What do you mean?”

“Oh,’re the virgin. Well, okay.”

She grabs my head and forces it near hers; our lips press up against each other. She sucks my lips and I do the best I can to reciprocate.

The bathroom door opens.

Sammie and I look, it’s Marla.

“Marla...Marla this isn’t what it looks like,” Sammie says, legitimately afraid.

“Oh it isn’t?” Marla asks rhetorically. “Then what is it?”


“Exactly! You bitch! What the fuck did you think you were doing?”

“Marla, I’m know he’s just so cute and I wanted him too...I wanted him too, you know?”

They both look at me with a slight smile.

“He is cute, isn’t he?” Marla asks her best friend, all cutesy-like.

With all the compliments going down about me I can’t help but smile as well.

Marla walks up to me with a smile.

“So you ready for your surprise?”

“Totally ready!”

“Okay, lie down on the floor.”

I quickly do so.

Marla sits down on my stomach; she’s heavy but I stifle the pain. I am gonna get fucked today and that’s all I give a shit about right now.


“Yep,” I say, just a tad strained.

“Okay, now close your eyes.”

I close me eyes.

I hear the jingle of a buckle hitting the ground; it must be Sammie because Marla is still on me and hasn’t moved.

Footsteps. I hear footsteps approach and then stop near me. I want to peak but I keep my eyes tightly sealed. Then weight. A sizable weight is on my head and face. I open my eyes into darkness. Where am I?

“You can open your eyes now.”

“Um...what’s going on,” my words are muffled by the weight.

“Your surprise silly!”

A popping fart exploded right in my face; PLOORRRPPP!

“Oh God!” I yell.

The smell hit me instantly; it was so terrible, so thick and rancid. I kick around but only my feet move; the rest of my lower half is under Marla.

I hear Marla take a big sniff.

“Oh yes, babe! Oh yes!” Marla says; she sounds incredibly turned on as she watches her friend gas me. “He’s really feeling it now! That was such a fucking good one!”

“I was holding it in,” Sammie said. “I still haven’t even taken a shit like I wanted to, figured it would help increase the...potency.”

Marla must have nodded because I didn’t hear any words.

“You got one up?”

“Yup,” Marla replied.

Sammie rose off my face and I was hit with bright lights; the bathroom fluorescents. They remained out of focus.

I felt Marla rise of as soon as Sammie sat down right the fuck on my balls; it hurt like being constantly punched right there.

I saw a large shadowy figure.

“You ready?”

“God...please, no!”

It’s too late; Marla jumps up and lands her big butt on my face. It crushes me; I feel like my head just squashed under her tremendous weight. Instead, though and more horribly, I sink well into her prodigious ass crack. I am surrounded by mounds of flesh...I can hardly breathe.

It’s quiet for a few seconds then I hear the subtle sounds of kissing; the popping of lips against each other.

I thrash around as I realize my air is getting depleted.

“Oops,” Marla says, “Forgot he needs to breathe... BRRRAMMMMMMMPPPPP...there ya go you little fart face, inhale that! Love it!”

I do inhale it...but not by choice. Loving it...I am not.

“Marla! Marla! Let me do one again...I got a nice one,” Sammie says as she jiggles around on my package. Despite the situation, that action got me a little excited; my penis involuntary rises a little and taps the crack of Sammie’s ass.

“Oh! What the fuck?! Are you hard you fucking pervert? Marla...this fucking pervert likes this shit.”

“Ironic indeed; let’s switch, I have an idea.”

Marla takes a seat on my stomach and then Sammie rises and then sits on my face as Marla scoots back, undoes my zipper and pulls my half-cocked member out.

“You like this, eh fart face?”

Marla takes my penis and shoves it into her asshole.

“God damn! You’re small dude; I can barely feel anything.”

The girls share an uproarious chuckle as I start to feel my already low self-esteem drop to nil. Humiliated, asphyxiating, and crushed (in both senses) are all words that would describe my current state of mind and physical state of being.

“Okay, I got an idea for small penis here; on the count of three. Ready?”

“One second...okay, yeah, ready.”




Two farts ring out; one against my face and another vibrating on my dick (must admit, it’s not a bad sensation).

“Oh my God! I think I squirted a little at him.”

She did.

They laugh so heavily; another fart rings out against my face.

“His dick is never gonna smell the same again; he’s a fart dick now.”

They laugh endlessly like schoolgirls.

“Should we switch again?” Sammie asks.

“Nah, let’s just stay where we are; I think we are about done with this little fart face.”

I black out.


I wake up in a cold sweat. I am in the backseat of my car, lying down, face down. I, unthinkingly, inhale with my nose and get a big whiff of fart; I guess the girls hot boxed my car with their little gassy game. I’m pretty glad I wasn’t conscious for it.

I get out of the car and head to the drive seat when I notice they scratched ‘Fart Face,’ in large letters, on every flat area of my car.

I kick my car in anger and frustration; it dents.

I hop into the drivers seat; the smell in my car is worse than before I had left it just seconds ago.

I turn the key in the ignition but the car fails; the battery is dead.

I lay my head against the steering wheel, defeated.

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